People Watching in Santa Fe

Spent 45 minutes today people watching. Was on Santa Fe’s Guadalupe Street at one of Charlotte’s favorite second-hand stores, so, while she was inside looking for bargains, I sat on a bench outside looking for, well, not really “for,” but “at” people. Below are my notes:

Women dress to shop; men don’t. And, while the males of most species are the most colorfully adorned, such is not the case for homo sapiens. Here’s a 30-something woman wearing a lime-green blouse, a royal blue hat and a bright orange scarf (Tennessee orange not Texas).

I bought a fire-engine-red vest last year, and my wife tells me it’s too bright. Why? Something to do with looking cheap, a condition I’m evidently pretty good at achieving.

And, when couples shop, there’s no doubt who’s in charge. She is. That is, men always walk behind their significant others. At least, they did today on Guadalupe Street.

Also, it’s important for guys to know what to say, or leave unsaid. For instance, this woman looks in the window and says a certain purse has her name on it. To which her man replies “Sure honey.” I thought it was the right answer; evidently not. “Don’t you ‘sure honey’ me,” she said with a tone that ended the conversation.

And I noticed a lone lady shopper in her 50s—how could one not notice her—who was wearing what appeared to be her husband’s shirt—only his shirt. You know, a dress shirt with long tails, giving the appearance of a slit up the sides, way up the sides. Anyway, the shirt hung down to mid-thigh where it met some flesh-colored leggings which disappeared into knee-high boots.

If you’ve been to a 40-year high school reunion, you’ve seen just the look. There’s always one present.

My most engaging subject was a cute five or six-year-old  girl,  who wanted to examine the Indian brave statue sitting at the store’s entrance. “The sign says ‘don’t touch,’” warned her mom. “This is a ‘look-only’ man.” Wise advice I thought; will be even wiser in 10 years.

The little girl grinned as she passed me, which, come to think of it, is what the lady in the long shirt did, too. Hmm. These are the females I attract.

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